Sundance Review: Krazy House

Nick Frost and Alicia Silverstone star in this obnoxious blood-soaked sitcom parody

Krazy House

Written & Directed by: Steffen Haars and Flip Van der Kuil

Starring: Nick Frost, Alicia Silverstone, Kevin Connolly, Gaite Jansen, Walt Klink, Jan Bijvoet, Chris Peters, and Matti Stooker

You know how you always hear about movies playing at film festivals where people start to walk out? Well, I didn’t witness that with Krazy House. Okay, well, the reason I didn’t is because I showed up just before it started and had to sit in the very front of the theater, looking under the skirt of the screen the entire time. But, that doesn’t mean walkouts didn’t happen. They did. A lot. By the time I got up to leave, having stayed the whole time, there were plenty of seats open in what began as a packed house.

That tells you a lot about Krazy House right there, and before you think, “Good, I want to see a movie that people walked out of!” think again. Some movies will test your limits in the best ways (Terrifier 2 comes to mind), while others are akin to being strapped down to a chair with your eyeballs peeled open like Alex from A Clockwork Orange, screaming to be set free from the sewage polluting your eyeballs.

I wouldn’t call Krazy House “sewage” per se, but it’s definitely a cinema skidmark. Directed by Dutch filmmakers Steffen Haars and Flip Van der Kuil who have had tremendous success in their native land with their New Kids franchise, Krazy House is an attempt to bring their mad-cap, bad-haircut, ultraviolent sensibilities stateside. Unfortunately, it’s so incessantly juvenile, half-baked, and ludicrous that it never registers as fun or shocking.

The concept is that it takes a traditional American sitcom and turns it on its ass halfway through, attempting to serve as a fourth-wall-breaking narrative that’s neither original nor inventive. Frost is woefully miscast as a do-gooder dad who wears a bike helmet and sandals with brushes on the bottom, (as well as a Jesus-themed sweater) who is raising his two teenage kids, Sarah (Jansen) and Adam (Klink), and navigating an obnoxious marital relationship with his workaholic wife, Eva (Silverstone).

Trouble ensues when some Russian repairmen, a father (Bijvoet) and his two sons (Peters and Stooker), show up to “fix” a water leak in the house and end up spending many days in the home tearing it up, obviously looking for something more than a leak in the pipes. What unfolds is an exercise in patience and endurance, as the film ever-so-slowly unravels into bloody chaos, not in an entertaining way that pushes limits, but rather in a juvenile half-baked way that feels like a joke made up on the day, rather than a fleshed-out concept that serves a purpose.

Frost’s character is a Bible-thumping Christian (his last name is even Christian) and throughout the film, he has visions of Jesus (Entourage’s Connelly) who gives dismissive advice to the struggling acolyte, who is fighting his recurring urge to “kill them all”. The Christianity jabs come swift and relentless, but it all reeks of low-hanging fruit, rather than something profound. It’s probably the only movie you’ll ever hear someone say, “Fuck you, Jesus Christ” before driving a stake through his head, so there’s that. For me, it was an eye-roll. That’s not shocking. As a Christian myself, I’m not even offended. It’s just lazy.

What hurts Krazy House is that they let the sitcom aspect linger for far too long. And by far too long, I’m talking 40 minutes. That’s 40 minutes of nothing happening at all, minus watching Frost’s cringe performance as a Southern-accented stereotype tries to navigate a family that seemingly loathes him. The filmmakers have stated that they wanted to take an American sitcom and really “fuck it up” with Krazy House, but others have done it better long before they showed up, with Oliver Stone’s Natural Born Killers being the gold standard.

By the time the format has switched to a traditional film (still set within the home), the “crazy” of the film just isn’t crazy enough. Maybe that says something about how desensitized I am, but if Krazy House wanted to make an impact with shock and awe, they mistook those things for stupidity and monotony. You’ve seen all they have to offer before, so it begs the question: why even attempt it if you don’t have anything new to say?

What you can expect: A green alien that shows up when smoking meth, a mumified baby in a bag of money, making out with a mumified woman, a cop getting his head blown completely off, a golden retriever getting her head blown completely off, a Lady and the Tramp sausage moment, a burnt penis on a grill, and a girl “giving birth” to a giant wad of gum. You’d be better off watching The Toxic Avenger or Terrifier 2 if you’re looking for grisly shocks and uncomfortable humor, because Krazy House is ultimately a trip down been-there-done-that lane. Then again, maybe this review makes you just curious enough to see it for yourself. If so, make sure to keep a tally of how long you last.